BEGINNER GUITAR LESSONS

Guitar_Lessons

If you are looking for a beginner guitar teacher, then I may be just the teacher for you!

My name is Nik, and I have been playing guitar for 15 years. I have been playing live and in professional settings for 10 years, and have been teaching for coming on 3 years now. I have experience with bass guitar, drums, piano, and a variety of other instruments as well. I am currently the vocalist/guitarist and primary songwriter for the bay area rock band Picture Atlantic (www.pictureatlantic.bandcamp.com), and have been for the last 7 years.

My approach to teaching is simple: I like to start with the basics (open chords, finger exercises, basic music theory) and then move towards learning the songs you want to learn and enjoy! I believe a huge part of learning is enjoying what you do! At the same time I also believe in hard work, consistent daily practice, and commitment to learning. I never took formal guitar training, and I think in many ways I am better off for it. Many music educators teach their students that there is only one “right” way to go about guitar, and I do not find this to be true. Following your own path in guitar is a great way to learn, and finding fun in music is a concept I believe heavily in!I have musical background in Folk, Rock, Pop, Indie Rock, and some Blues!

I teach all age groups, and have taught students as young as 6 years old, and as old as 43 years old. I currently have a practice studio located in San Jose where I teach lessons for my older students, but I primarily drive to my student’s homes to teach. My approach is not classical in nature, and I do not follow a book series for learning. Any lesson material will be supplied by me, and will include print outs of chord charts and other useful information. What concepts and techniques I teach my students are based solely off their personal progress with the instrument.

My rates run as thus:
30 Minutes – $30
40 Minutes – $40
1 Hour – $50
An additional $5 travel fee may apply if I have to drive 30+ minutes to you home.

If you have any questions, or want to get in touch about starting lessons, please feel free to e-mail me and I will do my best to oblige you in whatever it is you may need! Thank you for your time!
-Nik

Cthulhu Lives!


by Nik Bartunek

The best part about being in a band is that you meet some of the most interesting people on the planet. I know some very creative and interesting people, and its been my pleasure to do things outside music with them.

One of those things is gaming. I’ve mentioned about a million times prior to this, that I do a lot of gaming, and I’m proud to say that I’ve brought it to a new level with some friends.

I’m a huge fan of the Horror/Macabre Fiction writer H.P. Lovecraft. Lovecraft wrote at the turn of the century, and just about everyone on the face of the planet, Stephen King included, has been influenced in Horror writing by Lovecraft. He is most well know for his Cthulhu Mythos, centering around the horrifying and otherwordly Mythos of the Outer Gods.

A lot of media centers around Lovecrafts work, and one of those media outlets is in the gaming. More specifically the RPG format. With this Call of Cthulhu RPG, I’ve had probably one of the most amazing gaming experiences with my friends to date. To put it in a nutshell, the game is run by a Keeper (Me), and is played by Investigators (everyone else). The point of the game is not concrete in any way. I write an adventure for the players, who then play through the adventure using the rules for the game. This leaves the possibilities literally endless, and the players can achieve anything they wish in game, up to the limit of the rules.

I took this one step further though, and took the time to lay out real “scenarios” for the players to act out. Our band members Ryan, Rico, & Brian decided to play, along with our good friend and producer Aaron Hellam. With some set up, I changed garage of our keyboard players house, into a dark and mysterious study room. There, I placed clues I had made. Basically the game “Clue” in real life.

This experience was amazing, and I learned a lot about my friends from the way they approached the situations I had laid out. I remember years ago, my friends dad saying “In College, I learned a lot about my friends and myself by playing D&D with them”. In my head, I thought “This guy has crap coming out his ears”. I’m sort of timid to say that I was proven wrong. What he said made a lot of sense. Through this ridiculous and completely fun game, I learned a lot about some people that are very close to me.

Its sort of odd to think this. Games where you roll dice, and use silly voices are usually the games that the High school Pariahs play in some dark basement in New Jersey. Reading more and more though, I find a huge list of really interesting, and not to mention pretty cool people who did a lot of RPG gaming in their day. It made me feel less like a nerd, and more like, well…me!

That’s not to say that their success had anything to do with the fact that they gamed. I’m sure Nickel Back probably played a couple rounds of D&D in Highschool, and we all know that didn’t get them anywhere. My point is, that sometimes the nerdy, un-cool things in life, aren’t as bad as they seem. I can remember all the times as a kid, being at a family friend’s wedding, and seeing everyone dancing out on the dance floor. That may have had something to do with the amount of wine consumed, but regardless, it looked like a good time. Nervously I stood on the sidelines, nervously wringing my hands thinking “What if I make a fool of myself! What if I can’t dance well! What if, what if, what if…”. In retrospect, I greatly regret not having just gone and done it.

Sometimes, in life, there comes moments in time that can’t be repeated. Nothing in time is truly repeated, but we can always replicate a moment in some way. Through making a fool of myself, and using silly voices, playing scary music, and making 1920’s themed clues I went out on the dance floor and did it. I’ll probably look like a fool but I know that “I will become even more undignified than this” in the future. I don’t regret it now. In fact, I’m having the time of my life. I could just stay at home and make sure I’m wearing the right shirts, or that my pants are up to “Tightness Standards” but I think I’d be missing the point.

The more I run towards trying to be cool, the more I lose track of myself. Like Bill Cosby once said when asked the key to success:

“I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.”

I think most people who see me wriggling and singing on stage would be shocked to see me rolling a 20 sided die to find out how much damage I deal to an Orc. The reality is, I’m happy. The scene can keep itself, I have elves.

A Book By Its Cover

by Nik Bartunek

Once in a while, we all get the hankering to read a book. Some of us read entire libraries. Some of us read a shelf of books. Some, a row. Reading isn’t really everybody’s thing these days. Saying that in the company of our grandparents may get a “Tsk Tsk”. Its funny to think, from our age of the future, where media runs like water, that about 90-100 years ago, people waited in line for the release of the new Sir Arthur Conan Doyle adventure, or a P.G. Wodehouse aristocratic romp. Now people wait in line for the newest Blizzard video game.

When I was in Highschool I spent an insane amount of time reading. Most of my class periods were spent secretly reading instead of doing what I was supposed to do. Not completely to blame for this, among other things, I didn’t do so well in Highschool. I had a hell of a time though. It didn’t seem to me that anyone in my classes cared to read much. There were the twin sisters who read romance novels all the time, but that’s entirely different universe to explore.

Over time, I felt like I couldn’t stop reading. When we moved onto another book in English, I looked forward to that. As long as I kept pretty regular with reading a book, a whole world was opened up, and I got an awesome mental picture (sometimes) of what the author was trying to convey. Don’t take this for my subtle way of saying that I read Jack London, Oscar Wilde, and any other big-brain author. Most of my books were D&D novelizations or Arthur C. Clarke science fiction. I’m not a mental giant when it comes to my books.

Time went on, and I read less and less. Life consumed my mental energy, and my idea of a relaxing time was catching a quick movie. I read, but I didn’t read nearly as much as I had. Somewhere in the back of my head, I got a little sad. So much of my experience in Highschool (a rather important time for anyone) was really backed up by my reading. In some ways, I think reading so much, and seeing other places in my head (real or imagined) made me realize I didn’t want to finish Highschool, only to head to college and then a Cubicle job, like most of the kids planned to. At that point I didn’t know what I wanted to do, but I knew that I wanted it to be something I loved. Maybe I’m realizing what reading did for me now, in retrospect. It still does have a profound effect on me.

My sister is 17, and her and my mother love to read together. Through hearing snippets of them reading in the living room together, or in the car, I started to say “Geez…where did the time go? They’re even reading some books that I love!” Maybe out of subconscious goading, I slowly started to pick up reading in larger volume again. One particular book that I’m enjoying for the second time is Dune, by Frank Herbert. I’m seriously wondering why I never started reading it sooner.

So many people now enjoy Movies more than books, and I’ve heard an old guard saying things like “Books are better than movies! You’re using your mind and expanding your thoughts!” I’m not going to say that’s not true, but I’ve also realized that what it comes down to is that they are like comparing apples and oranges. Movies can’t compare to good books, and books can’t compare to a good Movie. I will say though, that it saddens me at how easy our culture forgets our imagination. A book paints for you in a unique way. It hands you the colors and says “This character has brown hair!” It doesn’t say where the lines are though. That is left up to you.

Maybe this article is less about convincing you all to read, and the power of imagination, as it is my thoughts on something I see to be very beautiful. Maybe I fear for the day when we use books solely as coasters, and the silver screen reigns entirely supreme. But then again, as my old pal Frank Herbert says “Fear is the mind killer….”.

Heavy Rain – The Rain Kept Me Up All Night!

Yeah...thats not ink...

by Nik Bartunek

Its really no secret that I am a huge fan of video games, and most gaming in general. Recently I’ve gotten back into it much harder than before, and I’ve divided my time between music and gaming. Eating happens in there somewhere. I can’t remember about the sleeping part though.

For a short time I worked at Gamestop. Yes, it is basically the McDonalds of video games, and the customer service training courses are run out of an Iranian Prison, but I have some amazing memories from that place. The one scarring, demoralizing feeling it left me with though, was that much like movies, there were no new good video games coming out. Monotonous game after game came out, and I would rent them or bring them home from work, and feel very saddened at my choice. When large software developers campaign a game, its much like a presidential campaign. The last guy sucked, so this hip new company comes along and promises you the world. “We’ll make the game as HD as modern technology will allow! We’ll even program the game to make you sandwhiches while you play. If that’s not enough, we’re going to change the face of gaming with our revolutionary new game mechanic blah blah blah” and so on, and so forth. Nobody really does anything much better. They are more concerned with flashing their sweet new spoilers than they are concerned with making sure the game play is great, and that the story doesn’t suck.

Lo and behold oh ye Israelites! The time is near! No longer do we wander in the desert, but we have found the promised land. I’ve been waiting for a title to come out now for a while. Its called Heavy Rain. I had played the demo with some other Picture Atlantic members, and we were floored. Thankfully, one member decided that enough time had passed without the game being inserted into his PS3, and he purchased Heavy Rain.As I type this, it is now 2pm. We beat the game at 9:30am, and started playing the game at 12:30am. Yes….we (well, two of us) stayed up all night to beat the game. And it was consciousness well spent.

I’m a huge sucker for Film Noir, and pretty much any detective flick out there. Mystery novels and TV shows of a darker nature get me in one try. Heavy Rain just happens to be a very dark Noir tale. The story line isn’t even the best part (and it is a fantastic story line). This is finally a game that delivers on its promise of being the next best thing. So below, I’m going to share some videos with you, and also a short review of the game in the hopes that you all sell your houses and buy PS3’s.

Heavy Rain Gameplay

As you can see, the game plays like one giant movie. There is no heads up display, only directional stick, and button prompts to cause certain actions to happen. That sounds boring right? Well wrong. The game still maintains a heavy suspense, and there are many times you are fumbling like quarterback for the right button combos. The amount of realism in the game is astounding. During levels that take place inside, you can do anything from turn on any light switch, to see whats in the fridge. Every little detail is of use in some way.

The story follows four characters, who are investigating, or are involved in some way with The Origami Killer, a serial killer known for leaving origami animals at the scene of his crimes. Each character plays a unique part in solving the crime, and you do everything from FBI work , to down and dirty journalism. The game is also based on constant decision making that will effect the outcome of the game. There are roughly six or seven possible endings, so the game never plays the same twice. If a character, such as Norman Jayden, an FBI Agent, dies while on the case, he is permanently out of the game. It won’t actually be the last you’ve heard of him, as the game will add his death into the story line, and will affect scenarios later where he may have been involved. This is also intensified by the gorgeous graphics the game delivers. The faces of each character, are extremely life like, and there were split seconds where I felt I was looking at a very nice photo.

The only downfalls are minor. The beginning is rather slow, but fun for people who like to get immersed in a game, and the game itself doesn’t have a lot of game play hours (as you can see from my sleep schedule). Not too many games can be cross generational like this game is. Its easy enough to pick up, that anyone could play, and the story line is very complex and keeps you captivated. As I mentioned before, its like playing a movie. Everything from the camera angles, to the transitions, make you feel like you’re inside the movie “Seven”.

If you get a chance to play this game, I would highly recommend it on its amazing replay value, and its evolution in how a video game is played. Be safe out there, and don’t let the Origami Killer get his ugly mitts on you!

Hey Hey Kids!

by Nik Bartunek
I remember a lot about my childhood. Most of those memories will never escape me, and for the most part, I’m really happy about this. I can clearly remember many amazing times romping around the neighborhood with buddies. Remembering sneaking into the plant nursery located behind my block, and much like Metal Gear Solid, sneaking past the workers. I can remember hearing the rain on my roof in the winter, or the hot sun heating the pavement in the summer. All of them positive.

One thing that we all collectively remember as children, are the shows that we watched.

I see a parallel between the shows you chose to watch as a child, and the music you choose to listen to now. In some ways, we can tell a lot about someone from the music they listen to, and I think it can also be a way for us to gain a certain identity. The same with children’s show. Pretty much everyone liked Power Rangers, but there was always that weird kid in the class who liked Beetleborgs more. Don’t ask me why.

The other day I spent a while thinking about the shows I used to watch as a kid, and then realized something immediately: how poorly written and produced they were.

I mean, that goes without saying right? But if you really take some time to think about it, some of the things we thought were so super cool as kids, were just plain wack! And the thing that also sprung to mind, is that fact that these shows projected an amazingly warped reality onto my mind. Watching Ronin Warriors just made me think that with enough Martial Arts training, I could jump 30 feet into the air, and punch holes in concrete. I’m ashamed to say, that as a child, I actually tried this.

So for you, I’ve arranged a list of the shows that made my childhood, and my startling retrospect into their structure and layout:

Pokemon – Proof that writers are lazy, and kids love that!

Everyone knows Pokemon. I had the cards. Watched the shows. Saw all the movies. I think everyone did for the most part. Most kids I knew had an extensive card collection, and our bass player Ryan was a tactical genius when it came to actually playing the card game. Pokemon was god, and all children were frequent worshipers at the Pokemon temple. Thinking about it now, the fanaticism that followed this show was actually pretty scary. Fourth and Fifth grade were the big times in my life when Pokemon reigned supreme. I attended Slater Elementary in Mountain View, and there were hall/yard monitors of sorts, called Slater Gators (our school mascot). Our job was to roam and patrol the dangerous and gritty sidewalks and by-ways of the school yard. So essentially, we just wore an over sized green jacket and bossed the younger kids around. At one time Pokemon cards were outlawed at school. When you make anything illegal, it creates a certain, how should I say it? Criminal element in the population. We spent many a school recess shutting down Black Market Pokemon Smuggling Rings. Two times in particular, I can recall catching groups of third graders in a circle, trading contraband to each other and then yelling “Five – Oh!” and running away as our Pokemon Dragnet squeezed tighter.

Taking a close look at the show really brought back some memories. I’m truly floored at how ripped off I really was. In a nutshell, the show was a vehicle to sell the cards, and the figurines, which you clearly needed to have in order to “Catch em all!”. The only thing I caught onto at that age, was the fact that EVERY episode of the show was exactly the same. Literally. Here is a run down of every episode: The main character Ash finds a new Pokemon that he must subjugate and capture in a small ball, so he calls on his friendly electrical rodent Pikachu. A battle ensues, and through a violent and heartless battle where downtrodden animals are forced to fight each other for the amusement of a human, Ash and Co. learn about overcoming personal and emotional challenges. Then Team Rocket shows up! This villainous trio is comprised of what appears to be Ani Defranco, a foppish latent homosexual, and a talking cat. In their attempt to kidnap the all-powerful Pikachu, they are then hit a powerful jolt of electricity and shot thousands of feet into the air while crooning their lament, and catchphrase “We’re Blasting off Agggaaaaiiinnn”. And no matter how much Team Rocket tries, and fails, they still are unable to learn from the 3,568 other times they were electrocuted and beaten that they will never win, and should find work elsewhere (Google or Sun Microsystems preferably).

What this show taught me as a child: That cock-fights shouldn’t be outlawed in the United States. Oh, and also, that capturing animals against their will is totally ok, and that regardless of their attempt to escape, they actually enjoy captivity, and with enough time, can gain the ability to shoot lasers from their eyes.

Mighty Max – WTF?!?!

I still don’t know what this show is about , but it sure freaked me the hell out as a kid.

He-man and The Masters of the Universe – When man reigned supreme!

When you’re a kid, you don’t catch on to stuff like you do now. As you grow older the world either pollutes, or enlightens you with information that causes you to see things in a new light. When I was a kid, He-man was the most awesome, manly, powerful dude around, and for a boy of 10, there is nothing more awesome than a muscular guy running about with a sword in hand, slaying monsters. Looking at this video now, I’m sort of disturbed. At the end, he describes that only three other individuals know his “Secret”. When he “transforms”, the only thing I see changing are his clothes. And to me, those clothes look mighty gay. Hey man, if he wants to gallivant around the universe and swing his sword, more power to him.

G.I. Joe – Hoorah!

More in the vein and time with He-man, I’d have to say this show really explains a boy’s young life. Blowing stuff up. Punching out the bad guys. Shooting machine guns. I can’t really say that this show is weird for any reason, but I’m sure with an extended watch, you’d probably want to join the marines.

Power Rangers – Go go Power Rangers!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UgQhyquS9Ms

Power Rangers. The name itself evokes so many images in my head. Specifically a giant floating bald head.

Another tried and true recipe: Take a weird Japanese kids show, adapt it for American audiences, and you have a success on your hands! I’m pretty sure we all know the story when it comes to Power Rangers, but I’ll just go over it one more time. The story entails a group of teens who are called upon to don mystical cosmic powers, and are granted the rights to be The Power Rangers, a group of intergalactic martial artists who defend the world from the evil Rita. On their side, they have a giant floating bald head, who goes by the name of Zordon, and his plucky C-3P0’esque robot Alpha 5, tends to his needs.

There wasn’t much depth or change in the story line. Rita makes some cooky monster, based off something like Cookie Dough, who then comes to earth, bringing chaos and destruction where ever he goes. The Rangers come and fight him. The Rangers are not strong enough. The monster then “super-sizes” himself, becoming hundreds of feet tall. Then the Rangers morph their powers together, and using their robotic battle droids, Zords, form a giant robot. Then, in a tribute to every Godzilla movie ever, they begin a guy-in-rubber-monster-suit-fights-guy-in-rubber-robot-suit battle in a miniature city set.

The other thing that I remember about this show, and I don’t mean to become a conspiracy theorist, is the color scheme to the Rangers. Each ranger has a color: red, blue, yellow, black, pink etc. I do want to note that the Yellow Ranger was played by a young Asian girl, and the Black Ranger was played by a Young Black man, who did break dancing, and had a Zord that was an elephant. A little racist if you ask me.

Oh, and something else that isn’t a conspiracy theory, is that the Red Ranger went on to do Gay Porn. Yes. Really.

Beetleborgs – If Jay Leno Was Blue

With the success of Power Rangers, you had a lot of shows that basically copied the idea more or less. I was a huge Power Rangers fan, and I loved the series, which probably explained why I even watched this show. In fact, I can’t remember why I even really watched the show. Thumbs up for being able to add in a blue skinned genie Jay Leno-Elvis creature. Whoever has the writers ability to think that up, put it into the show, and make it fly, gets my two thumbs up. The basic premise is vague now, but I think its about three kids who discover alien bug technology in a haunted house, occupied by a Vampire, a Frankenstein, a Mummy, and the aforementioned genie character. Just reading that now made me realize why it was only around a short time.

Gargoyles – SCARY!!!

Now we delve into awesome territory. Having a kids show that can entertain children and teens/adults is a rare occurrence. Gargoyles did just that. I’m really still a fan of this show. I know that’s pretty dorky, but I must stand strong in my nerd-dom. Recently I got the chance to watch the episodes online again. Some faithful Gargoyles fan decided to put them up on Youtube.

The show follows Goliath, and his crew of Gargoyle friends. Cursed by an evil wizard, they are stuck in their Stone Form for thousands of years, until awakening in New York, after the castle they protected in Medieval times is converted into the top of a skyscraper (its a stretch, I know). The owner is millionaire David Xanatos, who coincidentally is sort of the bad guy. Over all though, the feel and tone of the show was much darker, and I think it gave the show some energy to feed off of.

I think the beauty about this show is simply this: Its reserved, in the sense that its for kids, but its also not reserved in how dark some of the content is. Not to mention the art and design is pretty good for something that comes out on a Saturday morning. I’d recommend this to anyone, and if anyone was a fan, get re-connected.

Batman: The Animated Series – Holy Frijole’s Batman!

Two words. Freaking Fantastic.

This show falls into a pantheon with Gargoyles. Great art. Great production. For a kids show, this was again, rather dark, which I think is exactly what Batman should be. Sort of like how Christopher Nolan got that Batman shouldn’t be played by George Clooney, I think the creators of this show got that Batman shouldn’t be confined to Adam West. I really can’t say much more about this show, except that its great. It won a series of awards for the animation and writing, which I think is a good testament to its quality. Again, some faithful fan put episodes up on Youtube. Check it!

The Tick – Spppoooonnn!

I have no idea why this show is as good as it is. I have no idea who thought this show up. I have no idea why its so funny. It just is. Any show about off kilter super heroes is always a favorite. I think this show was beyond me when I was a kid, but I enjoyed watching it. It wasn’t till I was much older that I started to get the humor. Definitely a classic. And besides, who can turn down a hero, who’s battle cry is “spoooonnnn”.

Strangely enough they also came out with a live action series, that to be honest, wasn’t that bad. I leave you with a clip of that as well.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UdXtLigz2pU

Animaniacs/ Pinky and The Brain – Yacko, Wacko and Dot

Can I get a round of applause here? Lets give it up for this show! *crowd cheers*

I really think this show is timeless. *one voice from the crowd boos*

(gunshot is heard)

Thank you! Anyways, on with my rant. I loved this show. My mom loved this show. My dad loved this show. College kids loved this show. Teens loved this show. Japanese businessmen loved this show. The show was just plumb funny. I’d have to say that Pinky and The Brain drew the older audiences in, but the overall experience was great. I think the only way to do this justice is to leave you with some clips:

That wraps up my history novel! I hope you all enjoyed this walk down memory lane. Remember, kids shows are just wierd!

One Ham Over My Heart

BACON!

by Nik Bartunek
From driving lifted trucks, to hunting. From voting Republican to drinking Budweiser. From surfing an F-16 fighter jet, painted as an eagle bursting from an American Flag, to converting your lifted truck into a Monster-Truck and running over Democrats, there are some things that are very American. Things that just scream red, white, and blue. In my strong opinion, one of the most American thing you can do, is to eat lots of greasy, unhealthy food.

Hey, don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking down on it. In fact, there are times when I, the skinny tall white guy, take this concept too far. Continue reading “One Ham Over My Heart”

My New Vampire Series That is Doing Quite Well

by Nik Bartunek

I’m not sure if any of you have heard, but I’ve recently been gaining a lot of attention for my newest series of books. I’m not really the Ann Rice type, but for some reason, I’ve had good creative success in writing a handful of Vampire teenage love stories. Or the Rovamps section at Barnes & Noble if you will.
The Scifi Network has already payed for, and begun filming the first book, in a straight to TV/DVD format. But there is already talk of filming the next novel!

So I thought it would be fun to share some quotes with you from the books.

Enjoy.

“Brenda had seen him around the school, standing up against walls, or sitting in the corner of the cafeteria, just watching people go by. He had even made eye contact with Brenda a couple times; or maybe it could have been his one lazy eye. Regardless, she found him extremely attractive. He was so dark and dreamy, yet full of raw teenage angst. His vintage clothes gave him a very Indie look, but his pale features, and dark lock of flowing hair also made him look like a Hot Topic employee. Brenda couldn’t control herself. What man could be of both the Indie and Emo world? Brenda knew who; a total hunk-muffin” – That Part of The Day Immediately Following Sunset, Chapter 3

“…”Yes Brenda, I’m a vampire” said Edwin. Brenda’s face drained white with shock, almost as white as Edwin’s. “Vampire’s are real. Just like Werewolves, Frankensteins, or Crab-People…” – That Part of The Day Immediately Following Sunset, Chapter 8

“Have you ever imagined what it would be like to be famous, or be in a movie?” mused Brenda. Edwin sat and thought on this for a moment. “Yeah, I have a little bit. It would be great. They would make multiple movies, chronicling my life. There would even be a vast empire of extremely modern, but mostly inexpensive merchandise.” This idea gave Brenda the shivers, but Edwin continued. “There would be these awesome wall posters of me for like $19.99 plus tax that you could get at all nearby Target’s, Forever 21’s and Hot Topics. And I’m pretty sure there would be these really kick ass movie soundtracks with bands like Paramore and some other currently popular bands for the really low price of $15.99 plus tax at Rasputin, or Target.” This idea was too much for Brenda. She knew that with such poetic ranting, Edwin had to be the Vampire for her. Any person with such scope, vision, and abs, had to be the one she was in love with” – That Part of The Day Immediately Following Sunset, Chapter 15

“Brenda cradled Edwin’s head in her arms, and slowly began to stroke his flowing mane of James Dean-esque hair. “Brenda?” said Edwin in a very sexy soft voice that was like…super sexy and soft. “Yes my dearest?”. Edwin paused, and then stared deep into Brenda’s soul. “Of all the hundreds and thousands of years that I’ve been alive on this earth, out of all the girls I’ve met, and been in love with, and the couple that I’ve turned into Vampires, I’m pretty sure that I love you the most, and that I’m the most in love with you. I really mean that.” It was the sweetest thing any Vampire or Human had ever said to Bella. She had really low self esteem anyways. – The Part of The Day Immediately Following Sunset, Chapter 20

And now, moving on to some highlights from the second book, being turned into a movie as well.

“Unhand Bella…I mean Brenda!” fumbled Edwin, in a phrase that almost cost the Author a lawsuit. the Evil Lord Vampire Mephistophosoleze laughed with the cold iron lungs of an evil Lord Vampire. “Bella..I mean Brenda is mine now, and there is nothing you can do to stop me!” With that, Edwin then drove a stake through Mephistophozoleze’s heart. With a shriek, he fell backwards over the railing, clutching at the protruding piece of wood. “I regret noooottththhhhiinnnggggg..

….”His voice trailed off into the darkness, and with that, he disappeared deep below into the Wendy’s trash compactor. – Gibbous Moon, Chapter 5

Well, I hope you enjoyed what you read. I’d also like to remind you that you can catch my movie at 3am, next Sunday night on the Scifi network, and can probably pick up the collectors edition of the full series for $9.99 in paperback from most Barnes & Nobles, and most Arby’s kids meals.

Till we meet again,

-Nik